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Our Wandering Minds….

How To Stay Present When Your Mind Wanders

eyeOur mind seems to wander on its own, seeming to escape our abilities to tame it. How do we go about harnessing our thoughts and controlling our mind so that we can be present? This is a very good question and one that many have tried to answer. But there is no one answer, for it really comes down to you, not the path others have taken. Very often our own patterns of thought are stuck on a very personal cycle, repeating in patterns only known to us. And this is the essential component in releasing your thoughts and calming your mind. What one thinks about, what often comes to mind when you are not paying attention, is the key. You will find it is usually the same subject matter, if not the same thought occurring over and over again. These thoughts tell you what you are concerned about, or rather what you tend to focus on in life.

We create our thoughts, maybe not on purpose, but we are giving ourselves something to think about. When we let our mind wander like this, we tend to create stress and worry. We create a bigger issue in our minds than what really exists. Even if we are not aware of what we are doing, subconsciously we are manifesting stress and worry because we are focusing too much on one thing. We respond to this, that is why we may feel tense or worried without knowing why.

We can learn from our thoughts by seeing what concerns us when we are not paying attention. What do you think about when you are not really focused? What issues come up, and what keeps replaying over and over in your mind? Now this could be something you need to deal with internally by letting go of it, in order to quiet your mind. It may also just show you what you think is important. But do you really believe it is important? Maybe these are old thoughts that you feel don’t concern you anymore. Perhaps you can release them now that you understand why you have them. The real question is do you believe them, the concerns you mind plays with and struggles with?

Sometimes we are aware of what is really important in life and yet our mind will concern itself with what it wants. Once you pull yourself back and take an objective look at what your thought cycle is, you can understand it better. Just by looking at our thoughts we can stop the pattern and let it go. Understanding yourself a little better and seeing your thoughts as patterns helps release their importance because subconsciously we may believe them, pay attention to them, and even become overworked by them. Not only do we become distracted from the moment, but we also lose sight of what is important and real.

Do we believe our scattered thoughts, do we pay attention to them, do we let them rule our subconscious? Or do we objectively see what the issue is and release the cycle ourselves. It is not about breaking the cycle so much as it is about understanding it and then releasing it. So the next time you are not paying attention to your thoughts check in and see what they are about. Continue to do this, noticing if they are repetitive and what the main issue seems to be. Next find the connection it really has to you. Is it old, new, or part of something you have always had to deal with? Is it something that needs to be dealt with, or is it something you simply no longer need to think about? When we consciously release our thoughts, they will filter out of our subconscious. We can even quiet our mind and let it relax. When we take away our issues, our mind can slip into a more relaxed state, and we become relaxed as well. You will feel more at ease and even feel less worried in life. Instead of fighting your thoughts, speculate on their origins, question your attachments to that issue, and then let them go.

~J.W~

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Six Things Which Weaken the relations:-)

Six Things Which Weaken the relations:-)
1) Misbehaving
2) Ignoring
3) Lying
4) Breaking Promises
5) Avoiding Contact
6) Doubting
Six Things Which Strengthen the
relations:-
1) Good Attitude
2) Helping
3) Trusting
4) Respecting
5) Entertaining
6) Forgiving Mistakes………Agree????

Many times we judge the acts of others, How can we not judge!

Question:

How can we not judge when someone does an act that is harmful to us  in a harmful manner ? If someone is doing a harmful act, should we just accept the harm saying that it is just the maturity level of the person? If there is no right or wrong, then are we not letting people justify their wrong doings? Without judging how can move away from something unpleasant?

My thoughts:

Can we look deeper within ourselves? Can we see that many times our judgements happen due to our
vested interest, when a personal desire goes unfulfilled? If the very same situation would had happened to someone else, then perhaps we may not have judged it the way we did. However when the mind experiences a personal loss, then it is quick to judge, have you noticed this? Many times we judge the acts of others, yet when the same act is committed by us, we are completely accepting of ourselves. This happens to the best of us – this is ego and attachment at play.

Judgement divides the world into two, into that which is acceptable and that which is not. Once the world is divided, conflict is inevitable. When the mind judges something as wrong or bad, it becomes agitated, it moves off from it’s center. The mental agitation does not help in making the situation we are dealing with better. When in judgement, instead of seeking for a “solution”, our mind starts contributing to the “problem” at hand. And then, repeated, strong mental agitations programs our subconscious mind into believing that these unwanted situations is actually what we desire, and thus more undesirable situations begin to manifest in our lives.

Say you have a light dimmer with 5 levels, 1 being the lowest (dark) and 5 being complete brightness. To judge the dimmer would be to keep our minds extremely blissful when the dimmer is at level 5, being happy when it is at level 4, neutral at level 3, being unhappy with the dimmer when it is at level 2, and then becoming completely upset with it when it is at level 1 (dark). And then if you prefer darkness instead of light, you do the same thing, just that your emotions will be in reverse – you would be upset when the dimmer is at level 5, and happy when it is level 1. In reality, why don’t we judge the dimmer? Could it be because we know that it is the nature of the dimmer to give different amount of light at different levels? In the same way, could it be possible that different people  give out different amounts of “light” depending on their present state of mind and their level of spiritual/psychological evolution?

Non judgement does not mean we let people run all over us and not take any necessary steps to move towards making the situation better. Indeed take appropriate action Be aware of where the road leads Choose intelligence. Not every decision we make is a moral choice. Sometimes its just a matter of choosing between stupidity and intelligence, but detach your mind from it, which is the cause for your negativity. To not judge is to see the act of the other and experience no resistance in our mind. It does not mean we accept the act, neither does it mean we reject the act. It is choiceless, awareness of the act. It is seeing things as they are, without the veil of our beliefs, prejudices, and our attachments. In pure awareness, there is no mental agitation, and you get energy to move towards creating an improved situation for yourself. While our judgement makes the undesirable behaviour persist, our awareness changes the very energy, the very karma of the situation In some cases letting go is the right choice and as we all know every situation is different  life is what it is and what we ourselves make it.. we are who we are  we are where we are because of our personal life’s journeys And what we need to learn from it.

Copyright © 2010,2015 Joanne Wellington All Rights Reserved.

The Recipe For Life ~ Universal Laws and Principles

Universal LawsWhat is your experience of life? Do you experience life as a set of random  events in which you have little say and control? If you do, you form part of the  majority of people who live as victims of life, having life happen to them. In a  previous article we touched on the fact that although most people tend to live  this way, there is a growing group of people who, instead of struggling to make  a living, are having fun designing their lives. What makes the difference  between these two groups of people? Is the one group having more luck than the  other? The reality is that luck has nothing to do with it. Instead, the second  group, having fun designing their lives, have discovered one of the greatest  secrets to a happy and successful life – the fact that instead of simply being a  set of random events, every aspect of life is governed and its outcome  determined by the understanding and implementation of the Universal Laws and  Principles. As much as there are natural, physical laws that govern the order of  the universe such as the Law of Gravity, there are Universal, Cosmic or  Spiritual Laws and Principles that govern the order of life. In this article we  will examine some of these Laws and Principles and the role each play in  determine the outcome of life.

Before we look at these Laws and Principles, it is important to understand  what we mean by these terminologies.

Law – a binding rule. There is nothing you can do to change  it. It is immutable. Violating a law contains inherent harm, suffering or  punishment. Obeying a law contains inherent benefit, reward or blessing. The  suffering we experience as a result of violating these Laws should serve as  feed-back; lessons that we need to learn in order to change what we do in order  to change the outcome.

Principle – the underlying cause of an outcome. If you do  something a certain way, you can virtually predict the outcome.

These Laws and Principles are not intended to dictate to, or control you.  They are intended to inform and enlighten you as to the way things work. You  also need to be careful not to look at the workings of these Laws and Principles  as purely mechanical. Your will, desires and attitude also play a role in the  creation of your life circumstances, situations and events, as well as influence  those of others. The purpose of this article is to inspire you to look at life  in a new way and to assist during some of the more uncertain times in your life,  when you need answers to help provide some solutions.

It is important to understand that the application or implementation of each  Universal Law activates an inherent Principle. The outcome of  your life is directly determined by your knowledge and implementation of these  Universal Laws and Principles. “You will know the truth, and the truth will make  you free.

Although we cannot necessarily arrange the Universal Laws and Principles in  order of importance, it is safe to say that the Law of Cause and Effect is seen as the most basic of all Universal Laws. The Law of Cause and  Effect implies that nothing exists or is experienced independently or  capriciously. Every situation, circumstance or event was created by a cause.  Every cause creates an effect. The only way you can bring a change in whatever  it is that you are experiencing, which is the effect, is to change the  cause.

Following is a list of some of the Universal Laws that if correctly applied  and implemented will activate their inherent principles which in turn will  create causes leading to effects – the situations, circumstances or events in  your life.

  1. The Law of Mind – The condition of your mind or consciousness  (thoughts, will and emotions), positive or negative, will determine the  condition of your life, positive or negative. A positive, empowering mind will  create positive cause leading to positive effect, in turn determining the  quality of the situations, circumstances or events in your life.
  2. The Law of Attraction – Your thoughts attract to you those things  that correspond with the quality of your thoughts, positive or negative.  Positive thoughts attract positive situations, circumstances or events. Negative  thoughts attract negative situations, circumstances or events.
  3. The Law of Thought – You become what you think. Whatever thoughts  you entertain over a period of time (in your conscious mind) will eventually  settle as beliefs (in your subconscious mind) and will control the outcome of  your life. The only way to change disempowering beliefs into empowering beliefs  is to discontinue keeping your mind busy with disempowering thoughts and  deliberately start thinking empowering thoughts.
  4. The Law of Belief – Whatever your belief about anything (in your  subconscious mind) will eventually create according to that belief (according to the Law of Attraction). Essentially, your  beliefs consist of your internal dialogue – what you inadvertently say to  yourself about the situation – and your imagination – the picture you  inadvertently hold in your mind about the situation. One way in which you can  become aware of your beliefs is by observing your reality and paying attention  to what comes out of your mouth.
  5. The Law of Expectation – Whatever you expect (created by the belief  in your subconscious mind) will create according to the expectation. Do not  confuse expectation (which is subconscious) with wants and wishes. Wants and  wishes very seldom come true as they are usually based on a sense of lack, which  according to the Law of Attraction will create more lack. Every person has  expectations, whether of something positive or negative, creating circumstance,  situations or events accordingly.
  6. The Law of Acceptance – There is a saying, “whatever you resist  will persist”. The reason for this is that whatever you focus on will remain, as  focus feeds any situation with energy. Acceptance, not to be confused with capitulation or denial, but a conscious  decision to accept the fact that something is the way that it is without  attributing value to it, takes the focus off the situation, making it subject to  change.
  7. The Law of Focus – Whatever you focus on in your thinking, positive or  negative, is what you continue feeding energy. The object of your focus becomes  magnified and will remain. Instead, acknowledge the presence of the situation  with the understanding that it is subject to change and move your focus on what  you desire. The moment you remove you focus from the negative situation, you  allow for change in the situation. By focusing on what you desire, according to  the Law of Attraction, you will create more of what you are focusing on.
  8. The Law of Forgiveness or Release – Unforgiveness holds you to the  person or situation you won’t forgive or release – you are the one that suffers.  Forgiveness simply implies letting go of the emotion attached to the issue. You  know that you have forgiven when you can think of the person or event without  feeling the negative emotion.
  9. The Law of Love – Love (unconditional acceptance) is always  reciprocal. The more you love, not necessarily only the experiencing of the  emotion, but the acceptance of the person as created in the image and likeness  of God (separating the persons’ actions from their being), the more you will be  loved in the same way.
  10. The Law of Gratitude – Whatever you are grateful for for, you will  experience more of. The Laws of Focus and Attraction work  together in this instance. Starting the day  with an Attitude of Gratitude sets the mood for a positive  experience fo the rest of the day, in spite of perceived negative  situations.

The million dollar question should now be, “how do I apply and implement  these Laws and Principles?” In another article we will learn how to do just  that. For now, it is important to develop a knowledge and understanding of the  Laws and Principles mentioned above. It is important to understand that there  are many, many more of these Laws and Principles, literally for every aspect of  life. Once learnt and implemented, you will no longer feel a victim, but become  a designer of your life. Enjoy the journey!

http/www.ttk.co.za/

 John  A. Smith –    About the Author:

I am a public speaker and teacher as well as mentor in the field of recovery  and personal development.I can be contacted at john@ttk.co.za. Website  http//.co.za/

Personal Growth Starts With The Self Image

There are many articles and pieces of information about personal growth and  the self image, most of which help the  reader to push forward in life and make important changes if they can. Many  times however changes are only temporary and we very quickly resort to our old  ways. One thing I have learned about personal growth is it is sometimes  difficult to take on board all the information that is available, partly because  of the sheer quantity of it and partly because it’s big business  and there always seems to be a new way of doing something. It’s hard to  keep abreast of the latest product or idea.

higher selfI am writing this article to introduce you to some beneficial ideas that I  have learned about personal growth and in particular the self image over the  last ten years or so. I have put these ideas into practice and have had huge  successes, although initially I found it hard going. I hope you benefit too.

All your actions, feelings and emotions are consistent with your self image.  By the way your self image was forced upon you when you were a child. The  environment and people you grew up with formed the image of yourself while you  were very small and impressionable. Of course you did have some say in the  matter as you grew older but your basic self image was formed when you were very  young. This means of course you are not responsible for any feelings and beliefs  you now have since you didn’t intentionally create them! However the good news  is, now that you are an adult, you can redesign the image of yourself and  therefore your life, exactly the way you want it!

So then, the self image can be changed. Positive thinking doesn’t help  because it is external. If you change your self image everything else has to  change too. Your whole life has to be consistent with your new image. In each  person there is a ‘life instinct.’ We all want more life, more health, more  happiness and success. In Maxwell Maltz book ‘Psycho-Cybernetics’ he describes  this life instinct as a ‘creative mechanism’ which if used correctly becomes a  ‘success mechanism.’ This mechanism must have goals to work on. These goals are  of course mental images created by your imagination. Your number one goal should  be your self image. He says ” Our self image prescribes the limits for the  accomplishment of any particular goal. It prescribes the area of the possible.”  So then you must visualise and act out new action patterns. You must act as if  you are wealthy, successful and the person you want to be.

Most people unfortunately still are unable to put the previous paragraph into  practice – I was one of them – and achieve what they want out of life therefore  the following information is for them.

Your self image is created in two ways. Both are crucial to your success. The  first is A BELIEF IN YOUR ABILITIES. This part of your image can be changed  easily by rational thought. If you are not able to do something then go out and  learn how to do it. This new confidence will help you achieve your goals. You  can do or learn absolutely anything to be the sort of person you want to be.  Since this part of your self image needs you to actually get up and learn a new  skill or become more knowledgeable about a particular topic, to help you become  the person you want to be, I don’t want to spend too long speaking about it.  It’s up to you! If you really want to achieve or become better at something or  be a certain type of person there is plenty of information on how to do it. The  internet is a fantastic resource to start with. Just do it!

The second way your self image is created is a belief borne out by how you  feel EMOTIONALLY about yourself. Your self image has to be consistent with how  you feel about yourself emotionally. This emotional charge can be very powerful  depending on how you were treated as a child.

For example….when you were a child, if you asked your mother to help you  with a game or some painting you were doing and she said ‘No, I’m too busy,’ the  emotional content of that statement would of had a huge influence on your self  image. Let me explain. If she said it with a smile and a soft voice then that  would have had a positive effect on your self image. However, if she said it  harshly with a scowl on her face that would of had a negative effect on your  self image. It is the emotional content of what she said rather than the answer  itself that makes the difference. As a child you would have experienced many  such episodes, some good, some bad. Hopefully the good would have outweighed the  bad. If you have a negative self image which has been formed in this way you  will not be able to improve it by rational argument. By the way people who have  a negative image of themselves, formed in this way, put everybody else first all  the time, believing that they are unimportant. They believe that they don’t  deserve very much from life. We all know somebody like that.

As we grow up these emotionally charged incidence have less of an effect on  us. Psychologists tell us up to 5 years old is the period we are most  susceptible to this type of self image formation, however we are still  susceptible up to the age of about 12 years old.

So why can’t we just change things?

If we now know that having a low self image due to emotional events while we  were growing up is holding us back, why can’t we just change those feelings to  more resourceful ones?

Well these feelings and emotions were formed by emotional events during your  childhood, and the belief you have about yourself is buried deep in the  subconscious mind. If you were aware of every feeling, every emotion, every  thought, then you could change things into something more resourceful. However  this level of awareness would put you in the zen monk category. I talk about  this on my website below.

For the majority of people this just isn’t going to happen. The subconscious  mind doesn’t care if you are unhappy or poor or lonely. The subconscious mind is  concerned with your survival. Your  internal world was formed while you were young and it was formed in such a way  that it gave you the greatest amount of safety and security.

For example….while you were growing up, you learned that water is safe to  drink but dangerous to fall into, likewise, electricity powers a light bulb and  gives you light so you can read but is extremely dangerous to touch.

Your subconscious does not want to change any of this information because  doing so might be dangerous to you. Likewise the self image formed from  emotional events and deeply ingrained in your subconscious is part of you and  must stay there to keep you safe as far as your subconscious is concerned. Your  earliest experiences gave your subconscious mind enough data to build up a  picture of who you are and how much you are worth. If your self image is such  that it believes that you are a failure your subconscious mind will have you act  in such a way as to fulfill this belief every single time!

So how do we improve this part of your self image?

Your subconscious created it so you could be as safe and secure as possible  when you were young, given the circumstances you had to deal with. We can  improve it very easily by doing something that most people are familiar with but  unfortunately don’t do properly and that is of course by goal setting.(more information on my website below) By goal  setting correctly we immediately give the subconscious mind something positive  to work on.

If you remember, I said that this part of your self image only responds to  the emotional content of your perceived world. This is the reason you have the  kind of self image that you have now. Therefore it is important to realise that  this part of your self image will only RESPOND TO EMOTION ONCE AGAIN. This is  why you must IMAGINE and VISUALISE what you want. You must get EXCITED about  every aspect of it. If you don’t get excited then you must choose another goal.  Unfortunately people try to make their goals ‘realistic’ in terms of what their  present self image tells them they are capable of.

For example….the person who wants the million dollar mansion but settles  for the 200K one because his present self image tells him he has to be  ‘realistic.’ It is this very ‘realistic’ self image that has kept him down in  the first place! If he kept imagining and visualising what he really wants, and  gets excited about it, the subconscious mind HAS TO bring the opportunities that  will help him acquire his million dollar mansion! This is the way Universal Law  works!

If people would only realise that the subconscious will make all their dreams  come true if they believed this to be the case. Doing little action steps  towards each goal on a daily basis will keep you positive and looking forward.  If this was done by everyone we would all be completely in charge of our own  lives and less dependent on government, welfare and outside influences.

It is such a pity that the subconscious mind is prevented from achieving  anything that you really want because the conscious mind judges everything by  what the eye and ear reports to be true, much of which is only perception with  no real truth. Personal growth is all about the self image and awareness. While  most people may never be fully aware they can certainly work on dreams and  goals. They can visualise and imagine how achieving them would feel. They can  become excited by the mental images. If they are persistent over time, and small  steps towards your goals are achieved, self image will improve and you will  become more confident. These small successes snowball into bigger ones and  before you know it you have achieved your largest long term goals. I wish you  huge dreams and success!

Maxwell  –    About the Author:Maxwell Hill is author of Ultimate Wealth Made Easy.To achieve what you want from life and improve your self image at  the same time you must   goal set properly.  Copyright: You may freely republish this article  provided the author, text, active links and this notice remain intact.

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