Want to discover how you can ‘Shine your Light’ brighter and reach your full potential as a Healer or Lightworker?
As a professional healer I am often approached by other healers wanting to find ways to heal their own wounds and self-imposed limitations, so that they can ‘step out of their own way’ and really get on with using their healing gifts and knowledge for the benefit of each other, humanity and the planet.
I have observed 5 key areas that healers and lightworkers need to address to reach their full potential and do their healing work at a much higher vibration.
1. Become part of a community of like-minded people
Too often, as a healer or lightworker, you may feel isolated in your family or social network as being ‘different’, possibly even a little bit ‘weird’! Many times that naturally high sensitivity leads to shying away from others and a tendency to introversion. Nurturing, supportive relationships can seem difficult to find. You may fear authentic expression of yourself for fear of ridicule or persecution (something which may have been a very real threat to you in previous lifetimes as a healer).
I have always believed in the importance of creating a safe space and networking opportunities, both personally and via the wonder of the internet, so that likeminded souls can really open up and talk freely together about issues that really interest them – a place, real or virtual, where others really ‘get’ where they are coming from and can engage in deep, meaningful conversations and learn from each other.
The benefits of such a community of like-minded healers can be far-reaching. Not only are you actively-engaged in the like-minded community, you can be happier and more confident about fully expressing yourself as a healer or lightworker, your vibration naturally raises, allowing you to do your healing work at a higher level.
2. Strengthen your connection to Source
Some of the ways I recommend are by spending more time Being than Doing, meditating more, being still and going deep within. Feel and write down daily in a journal everything you feel Gratitude for. Spend more time surrounded by the sights, sounds and aromas of Nature to feel your connection to the Divine strengthen. Whatever gives you pure, natural joy brings you closer to the Divine and ignites that Divine spark within you.
3. Put yourself as your number 1 priority
Healers and lightworkers are hard-wired to give to others! In order to continue to give to others at the highest level, you must first give to yourself and learn how to receive. Fill up your own cup first that you may give to others from the overflow.
You must be willing to do whatever it takes to care for yourself and to move beyond your own blocks and limitations, either by self-healing or in a therapeutic environment. Self-care must cover physical, mental, emotional and spiritual needs. As a healer or lightworker you are probably already good at addressing your spiritual needs and clearing the higher chakras, but how much physical exercise do you get and how nutritious is your diet? I think you get what I mean….
Balance and attention to self-care in all areas of your life is necessary to be performing healing and lightwork at the highest levels.
4. Develop high self-esteem
The archetype of Chiron, the Wounded Healer, is well-known and may be applicable to you. Often the best healers are those who have developed deep levels of compassion for others through their own personal life traumas.
If you struggle financially, have vague feelings of ‘not being good enough’, of having to ‘prove’ yourself as worthy or you hold back from speaking your truth, then chances are your self-esteem could do with a major boost. 85% of people suffer from low self-esteem in one or more areas of life.
This is a tough one for many people – including healers – who feel that ‘stewing’ in unforgiveness and anger towards those you perceived as having wronged you, somehow is getting revenge on them! The only person who is really getting hurt is you, maybe leading you to physical dis-ease. Often the offender has forgotten about the incident or never realized there was a problem in the first place.
Let it go! The gift of forgiveness is for yourself, not for the person who wronged you. Are you willing to hold your vibration low and risk serious diseases such as cancer just to be ‘right’? Forgive yourself, too, for having allowed yourself to be caught up in the drama for so long.
Perhaps more so than in any other occupation, as healers and lightworkers you need to constantly be working to clear your own physical, mental, emotional and spiritual blocks and limiting beliefs. Focusing on the 5 keys above is imperative for you to reach your highest vibration and potential to do your healing and lightwork. You owe it to your self. You owe it to the planet. As Mahatma Ghandi said, “Be the change you want to see.” Shine your light brighter to raise the consciousness of humanity and for planetary healing.
Michelle Mayur – About the Author:
Michelle Mayur is the ‘Healer for Healers’ and the visionary founder of the Heal the Healer global community. She helps healers and lightworkers reach more of their healing potential to raise the consciousness of humanity. To receive your FREE healing meditation audio and become a FREE Member of the Heal the Healer community of healers and lightworkers, visit www.heal-the-healer.com. Copyright 2011 Michelle Mayur
- Crystal Energy and Chakras (mediumsworld.wordpress.com)
Let’s face it. We all want to be happy. The pursuit of happiness is a common pursuit. We all realize, sooner or later, that outer success does not produce lasting happiness.
So what does? Loving ourselves and loving others. In fact, we can only love others authentically when we love ourselves.
So why is it that some people seem to feel self love easily, while others spend their lives searching in relationships or career accomplishments to find it? While it may seem cliche, the answer does seem to point to experiences in childhood.
What we know as self esteem begins, originally, in the esteem parents have for their children. Through the simplest acts of touch, attention to feelings, and guidance toward accomplishment, a child comes to see their own worth reflected in their parents’ eyes. They see themselves as love-able i.e. worthy and able to be loved.
These feelings are so powerful that they have been found to influence longevity. When through various forms of abuse and neglect a child fails to get this mirror of love, two things happen. First the child begins to take in the feeling of defectiveness or un-loveability. Since, to a child, a parent is God, parental abuse and neglect (including insensitivity to feelings) is experienced as justified. “If mommy or daddy treats me this way, it must be my fault.”
A second thing also happens. Children are masters at devising strategies to get love or prevent abandonment. A common “protective strategy” is perfectionism. “If I’m perfect, then mommy or daddy will love me.”
The search for perfection can become a lifetime one, whether it be for the perfect partner, the perfect accomplishment, or the perfect amusement or “high.” But the result will always be disappointing. Nothing can replace self love.
Is there hope for those who didn’t get enough love in childhood? The answer is a resounding yes!! But like anything worthwhile, it takes effort. The key is in the way we experience our memories of parenting.
Rather than being simply static memories from childhood, each of us carries within our mind an “inner parent,” a voice which talks to us much as our parents did. If our parenting was primarily supportive, our self talk will be so also. If our parenting was primarily negative, we will tend to be self critical much of the time.
Some of this self criticism will be a simple replay of what we heard. More often, though, a child criticizes themselves to protect their relationship with parents. In this fact lies both the source of much of our distress — and the seed of our renewal.
Once we realize that people with high self-esteem talk lovingly to themselves — especially when under stress, and those with low self-esteem are self critical, we create for ourselves a pathway to change. The goal becomes changing the way we talk to ourselves.
Three Steps to Move from a Pursuit of Happiness to True Happiness
Step One: Awareness
It’s amazing how differently we can talk to ourselves at different times. If we’re having a good day, our mind often reflects this in positive thoughts. Often, at such times, our mind can be very quiet and peaceful.
Contrast this with times we’re under stress or after experiencing some disappointment. At those times our mind can be quite negative and quite “busy.”
In my experience, when our mind is full of anxiety, and general static, we are often re-experiencing a “child state of mind.” In essence, a negative life event has sent us shuttling back in time to experience younger feelings. Once we can recognize how we’ve gone from feeling expansive and adult to insecure and childlike we have an amazing gift. We can feel compassion.
Step Two: Compassion
When ever we shift into an insecure child state of mind (we all do at times), we each “go home” to specific inner experiences of support, abuse, or neglect. Depending on our particular childhood, we will be able to generate self love and self care at such times, or not.
But whatever happens, it’s not our fault. This fact is crucial. Once we recognize that it’s only by the luck of the draw that we go home, in our minds, to inner parental support, we become more empathic.
We can feel love for ourselves and our particular story. From that compassion we can truly take better care of ourselves. We can undertake authentic adult action.
Step Three: Authentic Adult Action
In a child state of mind, we often feel passive and helpless. Our self talk includes either anxious statements like “I’ll never be good enough,” ” I can’t do it,” “If only,” or self critical ones “snap out of it,” “grow up,” or “stop making a mountain out of a molehill.”
Once we recognize that we’re in a child state, and have compassion to our unique childhood experience, we need to actively assert our adult energies. Authentic adult actions are those which help us shift us out of a child state to a more expansive and adult sense of ourselves. Simply put, authentic adult action involves greater self care.
Sometimes this involves just accepting our current feelings as a reflection of earlier childhood experience. At other times, it includes actively taking better care of needs. Whether it be preparing a nice meal for ourselves or calling a friend, authentic adult action is, in essence, being like a “positive self parent.”
Often, too, authentic adult action involves challenging our stream of negative self talk. This is much easier to do when we realize that we’re in a child state of mind. We may be stuck in the pursuit of happiness and not truly happy. Whenever we’re having catastrophic “what if” thoughts about the future, we can become more relaxed if we recognize that our thinking may be more that of a young child than a full adult.
This can give us compassion — and, often, a humorous perspective. The three keys to self love and truer happiness are awareness, compassion, and authentic adult action.
About the Author:
Jealousy can ruin your friendships, work relationships, and even your most intimate relationships. Jealousy often stems from insecurity and low self esteem. If you find yourself becoming jealous in many of your relationships, you might want to seek professional help to find out the root of the problem.
Jealousy is a road of feeling betrayed ,full of anger and having a need for revenge that will get you nowhere fast …”self torture”
Women are more likely to have issues with jealousy than men, but both sexes are known to suffer from it. For women, the feelings of jealousy are often a reflection of how they see themselves compared to other women. If you think another woman is prettier, sexier, and can talk to men easier, you may become jealous of what she has to offer.
The first step in overcoming jealousy is becoming aware of it. Write down what triggers your times of jealousy. Take a look at that list. Look for a common theme of situations and individuals who are on your list. It can be difficult, boy you are going to have to ask yourself some difficult questions about why you feel jealous. Avoiding feelings of jealousy allows the fire to continue while dealing with them puts the fire out.
Seeking the help of a counselor is a great way to help you work through your jealousy. They will help you identify the underlying factors as well as provide you with assignments to make behavioral changes to help you resolve those factors. You will need to improve your relationship with yourself before you are able to improve your relationship with others.
Perception plays a large role in jealous. For example you may be jealous that your best friend has found a new friend she spends a lot of time with. You can perceive this as your friend not wanting to be with you as much and think terrible things about the other person. In reality, your friend is just opening her circle wider. You can initiate the idea of the three of you doing something together. You may discover this other person to be a great person, and thus forge a new friendship that involves the three of you.
“You will not be punished for your anger; you will be punished “by “your anger.”- Buddha
Overcoming jealousy isn’t always easy. It involves addressing the issue head on. Be honest with yourself and with those around you rather than pretending the feelings don’t exist. Jealousy can leave you drained and angry. It takes a lot more energy to deal with jealousy than it does to let it continue to rage out of control.
In 1943, Abraham Maslow published his famous theory in psychology, now popularly known as Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Please see the pyramid below.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
According to Maslow, human beings have different types of needs that can be categorized into five levels, from the lowest to the highest:
According to the theory, only when lower level needs are satisfied, does an individual desire for higher level needs.
Level 1: Physiological needs:
These are basic needs such as air, water, food etc, without which it is impossible to survive.
It also includes basic needs of clothing and shelter to protect the body from the elements. The need for sex is also quite a strong need.
Level 2: Safety needs:
When physical needs are satisfied, the person looks to fulfill his security needs.
Safety needs include personal security, financial security, health etc.
Level 3: Love and belonging needs:
After safety needs are satisfied, an individual looks for love and belonging. there is a basic need to love and to be loved, both sexually and non-sexually by others. Lack of love can lead to loneliness and depression. Sometimes the need for love even overcomes the physiological and security needs.
Level 4: Esteem needs:
This includes self-respect and self-esteem. Self esteem is the normal human desire to be accepted and valued by others. There is a need to engage themselves to gain recognition and have an activity that gives the person a sense of contribution, to feel accepted and self-valued. These are split into two types of needs:
Lower self-esteem needs are the need for:
- Respect of others
Some higher self-esteem needs are the need for:
All the above levels of needs are called “Deficiency needs”, as a person is motivated to act by the lack of something that he values.
Level 5: Self-Actualization needs:
This is realizing a person’s full potential. Note that this is not meant in the spiritual perspective of gaining enlightentment, although it may come down to that for some people. Each person’s purpose is different, and also this can change as a person matures. Self-actualizing people are gratified in all their basic needs. Here the person is motivated for personal growth more than anything else. Here, there is no perceived lack, and hence Maslow calls this “Being-Needs”. The people who fall in this category are driven by purpose and are devoted to a a task “outside themselves”. They can be particularly talented at what they do.
There are many motivations behind the need for self-actualization’s. From a high level they can be categorized as any need for knowledge, beauty, and creativity. Some of these are the need for:
- Wholeness (unity)
- Perfection (balance and harmony)
- Completion (ending)
- Justice (fairness)
- Richness (complexity)
- Simplicity ( essence)
- Liveliness (spontaneity)
- Beauty (rightness of form)
- Goodness (benevolence)
- Uniqueness (individuality)
- Playfulness (ease)
- Truth (reality)
- Autonomy (self-sufficiency)
- Meaningfulness (values)
Do all people get to the level of self-actualization needs?
The important thing to note is that not all people that satisfy their basic needs automatically become driven by this self-actualization need. Many people who are wealthy are stuck at the lower levels trying to acquire more money, more power, more fame instead of the need to reach the full potential of their being. Other reasons people may not come into this level are:
- Poor childhood
- Lower economic conditions
- Inadequate education
- Anxieties and fears
What can we practically learn from this?
Each of us is acting from a different level of need. This is why it is not wise to judge others and prescribe to others a plan of action that works for us, as it may not be practical for the other person’s life.
- A person who is starving and struggling to have a roof over his head cannot appreciate spiritual knowledge. His stomach needs to be filled first.
- A person who never received much love from others throughout his life may crave to be loved so much that he or she may be willing to take an action that may be judged as immoral by some who are not operating out of that need.
- People who are driven by the self-actualization need may not be driven as much by the need to advance materially, which may not be understood by others who are not at the same level in the hierarchy of needs.
Understanding Maslow’s hierarchy of needs can thus help us appreciate what drives people to do what they are doing, and thus broaden our perspective, and be more accepting of others. It can also help evaluate ourselves and see where we are now with our needs, and where we want to go next.
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