How To Stay Present When Your Mind Wanders
Our mind seems to wander on its own, seeming to escape our abilities to tame it. How do we go about harnessing our thoughts and controlling our mind so that we can be present? This is a very good question and one that many have tried to answer. But there is no one answer, for it really comes down to you, not the path others have taken. Very often our own patterns of thought are stuck on a very personal cycle, repeating in patterns only known to us. And this is the essential component in releasing your thoughts and calming your mind. What one thinks about, what often comes to mind when you are not paying attention, is the key. You will find it is usually the same subject matter, if not the same thought occurring over and over again. These thoughts tell you what you are concerned about, or rather what you tend to focus on in life.
We create our thoughts, maybe not on purpose, but we are giving ourselves something to think about. When we let our mind wander like this, we tend to create stress and worry. We create a bigger issue in our minds than what really exists. Even if we are not aware of what we are doing, subconsciously we are manifesting stress and worry because we are focusing too much on one thing. We respond to this, that is why we may feel tense or worried without knowing why.
We can learn from our thoughts by seeing what concerns us when we are not paying attention. What do you think about when you are not really focused? What issues come up, and what keeps replaying over and over in your mind? Now this could be something you need to deal with internally by letting go of it, in order to quiet your mind. It may also just show you what you think is important. But do you really believe it is important? Maybe these are old thoughts that you feel don’t concern you anymore. Perhaps you can release them now that you understand why you have them. The real question is do you believe them, the concerns you mind plays with and struggles with?
Sometimes we are aware of what is really important in life and yet our mind will concern itself with what it wants. Once you pull yourself back and take an objective look at what your thought cycle is, you can understand it better. Just by looking at our thoughts we can stop the pattern and let it go. Understanding yourself a little better and seeing your thoughts as patterns helps release their importance because subconsciously we may believe them, pay attention to them, and even become overworked by them. Not only do we become distracted from the moment, but we also lose sight of what is important and real.
Do we believe our scattered thoughts, do we pay attention to them, do we let them rule our subconscious? Or do we objectively see what the issue is and release the cycle ourselves. It is not about breaking the cycle so much as it is about understanding it and then releasing it. So the next time you are not paying attention to your thoughts check in and see what they are about. Continue to do this, noticing if they are repetitive and what the main issue seems to be. Next find the connection it really has to you. Is it old, new, or part of something you have always had to deal with? Is it something that needs to be dealt with, or is it something you simply no longer need to think about? When we consciously release our thoughts, they will filter out of our subconscious. We can even quiet our mind and let it relax. When we take away our issues, our mind can slip into a more relaxed state, and we become relaxed as well. You will feel more at ease and even feel less worried in life. Instead of fighting your thoughts, speculate on their origins, question your attachments to that issue, and then let them go.
- Our Conscious And Subconscious Mind (mediumsworld.wordpress.com)
- Positive and Negative Thoughts ~ How the Subconscious Mind Works (mediumsworld.wordpress.com)
- Mind Power – The Secrets (mediumsworld.wordpress.com)
What is your experience of life? Do you experience life as a set of random events in which you have little say and control? If you do, you form part of the majority of people who live as victims of life, having life happen to them. In a previous article we touched on the fact that although most people tend to live this way, there is a growing group of people who, instead of struggling to make a living, are having fun designing their lives. What makes the difference between these two groups of people? Is the one group having more luck than the other? The reality is that luck has nothing to do with it. Instead, the second group, having fun designing their lives, have discovered one of the greatest secrets to a happy and successful life – the fact that instead of simply being a set of random events, every aspect of life is governed and its outcome determined by the understanding and implementation of the Universal Laws and Principles. As much as there are natural, physical laws that govern the order of the universe such as the Law of Gravity, there are Universal, Cosmic or Spiritual Laws and Principles that govern the order of life. In this article we will examine some of these Laws and Principles and the role each play in determine the outcome of life.
Before we look at these Laws and Principles, it is important to understand what we mean by these terminologies.
Law – a binding rule. There is nothing you can do to change it. It is immutable. Violating a law contains inherent harm, suffering or punishment. Obeying a law contains inherent benefit, reward or blessing. The suffering we experience as a result of violating these Laws should serve as feed-back; lessons that we need to learn in order to change what we do in order to change the outcome.
Principle – the underlying cause of an outcome. If you do something a certain way, you can virtually predict the outcome.
These Laws and Principles are not intended to dictate to, or control you. They are intended to inform and enlighten you as to the way things work. You also need to be careful not to look at the workings of these Laws and Principles as purely mechanical. Your will, desires and attitude also play a role in the creation of your life circumstances, situations and events, as well as influence those of others. The purpose of this article is to inspire you to look at life in a new way and to assist during some of the more uncertain times in your life, when you need answers to help provide some solutions.
It is important to understand that the application or implementation of each Universal Law activates an inherent Principle. The outcome of your life is directly determined by your knowledge and implementation of these Universal Laws and Principles. “You will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.
Although we cannot necessarily arrange the Universal Laws and Principles in order of importance, it is safe to say that the Law of Cause and Effect is seen as the most basic of all Universal Laws. The Law of Cause and Effect implies that nothing exists or is experienced independently or capriciously. Every situation, circumstance or event was created by a cause. Every cause creates an effect. The only way you can bring a change in whatever it is that you are experiencing, which is the effect, is to change the cause.
Following is a list of some of the Universal Laws that if correctly applied and implemented will activate their inherent principles which in turn will create causes leading to effects – the situations, circumstances or events in your life.
- The Law of Mind – The condition of your mind or consciousness (thoughts, will and emotions), positive or negative, will determine the condition of your life, positive or negative. A positive, empowering mind will create positive cause leading to positive effect, in turn determining the quality of the situations, circumstances or events in your life.
- The Law of Attraction – Your thoughts attract to you those things that correspond with the quality of your thoughts, positive or negative. Positive thoughts attract positive situations, circumstances or events. Negative thoughts attract negative situations, circumstances or events.
- The Law of Thought – You become what you think. Whatever thoughts you entertain over a period of time (in your conscious mind) will eventually settle as beliefs (in your subconscious mind) and will control the outcome of your life. The only way to change disempowering beliefs into empowering beliefs is to discontinue keeping your mind busy with disempowering thoughts and deliberately start thinking empowering thoughts.
- The Law of Belief – Whatever your belief about anything (in your subconscious mind) will eventually create according to that belief (according to the Law of Attraction). Essentially, your beliefs consist of your internal dialogue – what you inadvertently say to yourself about the situation – and your imagination – the picture you inadvertently hold in your mind about the situation. One way in which you can become aware of your beliefs is by observing your reality and paying attention to what comes out of your mouth.
- The Law of Expectation – Whatever you expect (created by the belief in your subconscious mind) will create according to the expectation. Do not confuse expectation (which is subconscious) with wants and wishes. Wants and wishes very seldom come true as they are usually based on a sense of lack, which according to the Law of Attraction will create more lack. Every person has expectations, whether of something positive or negative, creating circumstance, situations or events accordingly.
- The Law of Acceptance – There is a saying, “whatever you resist will persist”. The reason for this is that whatever you focus on will remain, as focus feeds any situation with energy. Acceptance, not to be confused with capitulation or denial, but a conscious decision to accept the fact that something is the way that it is without attributing value to it, takes the focus off the situation, making it subject to change.
- The Law of Focus – Whatever you focus on in your thinking, positive or negative, is what you continue feeding energy. The object of your focus becomes magnified and will remain. Instead, acknowledge the presence of the situation with the understanding that it is subject to change and move your focus on what you desire. The moment you remove you focus from the negative situation, you allow for change in the situation. By focusing on what you desire, according to the Law of Attraction, you will create more of what you are focusing on.
- The Law of Forgiveness or Release – Unforgiveness holds you to the person or situation you won’t forgive or release – you are the one that suffers. Forgiveness simply implies letting go of the emotion attached to the issue. You know that you have forgiven when you can think of the person or event without feeling the negative emotion.
- The Law of Love – Love (unconditional acceptance) is always reciprocal. The more you love, not necessarily only the experiencing of the emotion, but the acceptance of the person as created in the image and likeness of God (separating the persons’ actions from their being), the more you will be loved in the same way.
- The Law of Gratitude – Whatever you are grateful for for, you will experience more of. The Laws of Focus and Attraction work together in this instance. Starting the day with an Attitude of Gratitude sets the mood for a positive experience fo the rest of the day, in spite of perceived negative situations.
The million dollar question should now be, “how do I apply and implement these Laws and Principles?” In another article we will learn how to do just that. For now, it is important to develop a knowledge and understanding of the Laws and Principles mentioned above. It is important to understand that there are many, many more of these Laws and Principles, literally for every aspect of life. Once learnt and implemented, you will no longer feel a victim, but become a designer of your life. Enjoy the journey!
John A. Smith – About the Author:
I am a public speaker and teacher as well as mentor in the field of recovery and personal development.I can be contacted at firstname.lastname@example.org. Website http//.co.za/
Many people upon learning the law of attraction, get excited and start putting additional effort in giving to others, in the hope that in giving to others, they will get back what they want from them. Some of these people get disappointed that in spite of giving their 100%…, they are not getting from the universe what they want, and wonder why. Some quickly jump into the conclusion that law of attraction does not work. The fact is that spiritual laws always work, however it is important that knowledge is applied correctly. Knowledge put to action in the wrong way, or in the wrong context does not work.
In order to get what we want from others, it is important that we give others what they want, not what we think they need, and not what we want to give. A farmer owns a dog and a cow. If he feeds grass to the dog and dog-food to the cow, both animals will be unhappy and hungry, despite the effort put forth by the farmer. Although this may sound funny, simple, and obvious, this is exactly what we tend to do, as in various complex situations, we may not really know what they other person wants, and thus make wrong assumptions about it and put forth unwanted effort in the wrong place.
Practical examples of not giving people what they want:
There are two sets of emotional needs in romantic relationships:
Caring, Understanding, Respect, Devotion, Validation and Reassurance.
Trust, Acceptance, Appreciation, Admiration, Approval and Encouragement.
All of the above emotional needs are forms of love. Yet, just calling all of them love is oversimplification of our emotional needs. Although every one has the need for all these forms of love, research has shown that most women primarily need to receive the kinds of love listed under “Set 1” from their partners, before they can appreciate the kind of love under “Set 2”. In contrast to that, most men primarily need to receive the love under “Set 2” before they can appreciate the kind of love listed under “Set 1”. Unknowingly however, both men and women tend to give to their partners what they would personally need, instead of giving what their partners need. This is why many people think they are giving a lot to the relationship. Yet, both partners remain unfulfilled, as they are not giving what their partners want.
Say you are an employer and want to hire the brightest candidate for the job. You interview 30 candidates and then select the one candidate who met your criteria the best. Excited upon finding such a brilliant candidate, you offer him salary and benefits that are higher than you originally budgeted for. Yet, what the candidate really wants is not to work in the corporate world long term, but instead start his own business soon. In spite of you giving your 100% as an employer, you cannot fulfill the candidates needs. No matter what you do from your end, since the other person is motivated by contrary desires, what you give is not of value to him. You would have been better of to offer the job to another candidate, who although may not be academically perfect as the first candidate, actually wants a long term career in the corporate world and not start his own business soon.
You are hired as a software tester. Instead of working as a tester, you put rigorous effort as a software programmer, as you are not really interested in testing. Indeed, you may be working very hard, but not towards the reason you were hired, and thus your employer is not likely to be satisfied.
You prepare a beautiful three course non-vegetarian meal, putting lot of effort. It is the most wonderful tasting meal. Only problem – the guests that came to dinner are all vegetarians. Despite all your effort, the guests could not appreciate the value of the work you put into making the delicious meal.
Thus, in order to get what you want, it is very important to know what the other person needs, and give that. A person gets fulfilled only upon getting what he wants, and not upon receiving something else. Only in fulfilling other’s needs is it likely that they will work towards fulfilling our needs. It is important to realize that in some cases, the other person may not really want anything that we have to offer, or we may not want to give what they need. In this case, it is better to find other people who will be very fulfilled by what we have to offer, so that they in turn can fulfill us.
Does a soul-mate really exist?
As we move through life, we come across certain qualities in people that we are naturally attracted to. It could be something to do with how they look and carry themselves, perhaps it is their sense of humor or intelligence, it could be how caring and understanding they are, or maybe we fall for some of their unique talents and skills. At the same time, life subjects us to people whose qualities do not make us feel very good – through interaction with these people, we realize traits and behaviours in people that do not agree with us.
The desirable and undesirable qualities we observe around us cause us to seek people who match the qualities we adore, and move away from people whose qualities we not not appreciate. Each time we encounter people that are a match for what we want, there is an automatic asking that happens within us to have that person in our experience. Indeed, there are many people out there who could perfectly match the qualities you seek in your ideal partner. If you do meet such an ideal person, it is quite likely that you would feel great to be around the person. You could perhaps call such a person your soul mate.
The term “soul-mate” does not necessarily imply that there is only one person in the whole world that would match your preferences. Also, a soul-mate does not necessarily imply there is some mystical relationship that you hold with this person for multiple life times. Rather, the term implies that this is a person around whom you are more likely to be aligned with your own soul. In a sense, each person we connect with deeply is a soul mate. The key thing in a relationship is that you be aligned with you. It is your alignment with yourself that makes all your relationships beautiful, and thus seeking a person with whom you are naturally aligned with yourself works wonders for your relationship.
How do I find my soul mate/partner?
Before you find a partner that is ideal for you, by law of attraction, you need to be a vibrational match for the experience you are seeking with your partner. This means you need to be clear about what you want from your relationship, and make sure that you are not resisting the experience with your vibrational misalignment in any way.
Ways people normally get into vibrational misalignment with the partner they seek:
- Focusing on present circumstances that are not ideal
- Focusing on past relationships that did not work: Some people constantly focus on past relationships that did not work out as they wanted. However when the focus is on what did not work, it is hard to be vibrationally aligned with what you do want. Focusing on the past situations that did not work is likely to bring you unsatisfying relationships that are not a match for what you want.
- Feeling envious of people who hold the relationships you seek: People actively seeking relationships at times come across couples that seem to enjoy a perfect relationship with each other. When they meet such a couple, they compare their own life situation to the couple and get envious of the couple. This envy keeps them from being vibrationally misaligned with the partner that they seek, thus bringing them further situations where they experience envy, but no fulfillment of having the relationship they seek.
Often times people who are actively seeking life partners feel frustrated and lonely – they are inherently focused on the absence of the partner that they desire in their life. By law of attraction, this focus on lack keep a person from being aligned with that they want. This misalignment keeps pushing the experience they seek away from them.
Here are ways you can get vibrationally aligned with your future partner:
- Note down the qualities of people who you adore:
- When you encounter couples you like, sincerely appreciate them: When you encounter couples that you adore, appreciate the way they take care of each other. Sincerely praise them from all your heart. When you appreciate something, you are saying to the universe “More of this in my life, please”
- Get into vibrational alignment with yourself: Reach for a good feeling place within yourself. Being in alignment means being true to your own nature – which is being in love, appreciation, gratitude, and joy. Remember, no partner can make up for what is missing within you. You need to be compete within yourself to start with, so that your relationships also become naturally beautiful.
Whenever you come across people that you do like, do note down that this is something that you would like to have in your partner. This is putting out a clear request to the universe as to what you seek. The more clear you are, the better it works.
Think about the qualities of your future partner and the kind of relationship you will have with that person. If you feel pure positive energy flowing within you, and there is no attention to the fact that the person is currently missing in your life, it is an indication that you are getting vibrationally aligned with what you desire in your future partner. By law of attraction, when there is no resistance, your partner could be very well on his or her way to meet you.
It would be great! Yet there seems to be a large gap between what most of us want and what we really get.
Have you ever found yourself feeling helpless because your doctor can’t seem to figure out your illness or ailment? Or your therapist understands what the problem is (even tells you how to fix it) but no matter how hard you consciously try, you keep making the same mistakes.
The power to manifest the life you desire is truly inside you – in your subconscious mind. And I’m living proof that Focused and Intention is one of the most effective ways to access and clear old subconscious patterns that are holding you back from the life you really want.
My personal healing journey has been one of triumph over adversity but I would not honestly change a single event in my life. Each moment – good or bad – has contributed to deepening my inner knowing so I can share my gifts with the world. For the past 20 years I have made it my personal mission to create a safe place on Earth so people can journey to their full potential with comfort and integrity. Through my own personal growth the Creator has shown me the way to loving teachers with powerful healing modalities.
Our beliefs are magnetic forces that attract or repel things from us. The Law of Attraction, popularized by the movie The Secret, states that the imagination of sensory detail of our future life and the things that we wish to have in our life actually cause their manifestation – because the universe attracts to us all things that are in harmony with the mental and emotional energies of our projection.
This is a law of the energetic universe – like energies attract like energies. Create energy with your mind and the universe answers with the same kind of energy. The better you craft your energetic ideas, the more elaborate the universe’s response will be.
The catch is our subconscious mind puts out energy of enormous magnitude, dwarfing whatever our conscious mind projects. Crippling and limiting beliefs in the subconscious prevent us from manifesting what we consciously want. Therefore, however inspiring it may be, it is not enough to watch The Secret or read dozens of books published on this basic law of nature, unless you access and improve the contents of your subconscious mind.
With focus and intention healing you can connect with your source and produce profound changes in your subconscious beliefs and your life.
One man I worked with had the belief: “It’s not safe to speak my true feelings.” Each and every time he tried, he was overcome with heavy guilt and shame. On numerous occasions he tried changing the belief with positive thinking and with the law of attraction but he never had lasting results. When we got to the core of his belief using focus and intention he instantly felt a weight being lifted from his shoulders. He regained his self confidence and was able to speak what he needed without the heavy weight of guilt. His conscious mind was no longer being fed a command from his subconscious mind that is was unsafe to share his feelings. After he felt safe and confident when the limiting belief system was changed and he was finally able to take care of his personal needs which included getting out of a five year abusive relationship.
We develop beliefs at a very early age from our caregivers, our experiences and our environments. These beliefs are stored in our subconscious mind which then plays the same tapes over and over. This is why we tend to react the same old ways, even in new situations.
The great news is that we have the ability to consciously evaluate our responses to environmental stimuli and change old responses. According to the holistic model our being is made up of spiritual, mental, emotional and physical aspects. What we believe affects what we think, what we feel and what we do. Science now confirms that our beliefs even profoundly and directly affect our biology!
For example, if I don’t BELIEVE people can be trusted, I might think people want to hurt me. If I THINK people want to hurt me that is going to affect how I FEEL because energy follows thought. If I feel fear towards people, that will affect the choices I make and what I DO. If I fear relationships, I will not let people get close physically which could lead to feeling disconnected and alone or create health problems. Once I become aware of how this belief affects me I can change my belief with Theta Healing to create a broader conscious awareness.
Events that happened in our life that we don’t finish processing get held in our energetic field on all levels. These unfinished events have a big hidden influence on many of the choices we make and the things we do or don’t do.
The trick to getting rid of unwanted beliefs and values is to be able to learn how to spot them. First, pay attention when something happens that ‘pushes your buttons.’ Second, stop and listen inside. The secret is in the momentary gap – AFTER the outside event and BEFORE your feelings about it.
When we stimulate the mind and clear negative thought impulses, we can raise the vibration of the brain action to a place in which new creative solutions to problems arise and you are able to manifest anything that you wish to attract into your life.
Every time you identify the belief and use focus and intention on yourself or others you are bringing more balance to your life and raising your vibration level because the more negative thought impulses you clear out from your subconscious, the more you will connect to this creative flow. When you no longer are RE-acting toward life, you begin to become present to the infinite possibilities held in each moment.
I imagine that some of you may have thought: “I’d love to change, but I don’t know how.” Some of you are probably scared to take steps to change, while some of you have just been waiting for the right time. Well now is that right time. I want to invite you to take the opportunity to remove an obstacle that’s been in your way, take on an issue that you’ve been ignoring, address one of your integrity issues, find the courage to get help with one of your addictions, uncover one of your biggest lies, give up a grudge or an insecurity, face one of your biggest fears, and to be able to enthusiastically finish this sentence: “Thank God I finally handled__________________!”
Note: This information is for educational purposes only. It is intended to supplement your current health program and not to replace the care of a doctor. For diagnosis or treatment of any disease please consult a licensed physician.
Loretta Mohl, Coach, Author & Founder FIT
Loretta has spent the past 25 years living and promoting heart-centered consciousness. She is the founder of the Canadian College of Healing Arts and the Focused Intention Technique™; both are dedicated to providing a service which awakens the individual’s Unlimited Potential. Since her introduction to energy healing in the late 80s, she has studied many formal and natural healing approaches. After those years of study and much reflection, she formulated Focused Intention Technique™ (FIT™) utilizing many elements from her life’s work and drawing deeply from her own instincts. She named this dynamic healing modality, Focused Intention Technique™, because it so perfectly describes what she knows to be the absolute truth: The body knows how to heal itself and by just activating intention and focus, the body will do the rest. Check our blog http://justlivingyourlife.com or website at www.lorettamohl.com for more information or to recieve your free meditation journey.
- To change your life, change your beliefs “simple”. (joannewellington.wordpress.com)
- Seven steps to reduce your ego, (joannewellington.wordpress.com)