“Sara!” her mom yelled. “What are you doing? You know to do your chores right when you get home! And you’re late!””Coming, Mom!” Sara yelled, getting up and stomping towards the kitchen. “What?” she snapped as her mother gave her a stern look, annoyed.
“You’d better straighten up your attitude, young lady,” her mom warned, “or you’ll be grounded.”
“Whatever.” Sara began to throw around the dishes in the sink, trying to make as much noise as she possibly could. A plate cracked and cut her hand. Sara cursed.
“Sara!” her mom exclaimed. “How dare you use that language! Go to your room!”
“No!” Sara yelled, throwing down the towel she was using to wipe the blood off her hand.
“Do you want to say ‘no’ one more time and see what happens?” her mom asked. She looked furious.
“Sure,” Sara said sarcastically. “No.”
“How dare you!” Her mother slapped her.
Sara shrank back, staring incredulously at her mom. She had never hit Sara before.
“I HATE YOU!” Sara screamed before running out of the house.
“Sara, get back here!” her mom yelled, running after her.
“Leave me alone!” Sara screamed, running across the street. “I HATE YOU!” she screamed again.
She continued running until she heard the sound of screeching tires and a scream. She turned around, hoping that it wouldn’t be what she thought it would be….
People were crowding around Sara’s mother, who was laying in the middle of the street, looking broken, bloody.
“NOOOO!” Sara screamed, running over and pushing through everyone to kneel by her mom. “Oh no, oh no….”
Her mom wasn’t moving or breathing. She was gone. Sara tipped back her head and wailed to the sky, sobbing so hard it hurt.
She couldn’t believe the last words she had spoken to her mother were “I hate you”.
“Every time you abuse a child, every time you hit a child, every time you swear at a child,every time you put fear into a child. Every time you are negative with a child. What are you Educating them into?
You are not educating them into them into “Love” you are not educating them into feeling good and liking themselves, you are not educating them into feeling confident and positive you may as well just rip all their friends away from them before they start making them as that is what you’re doing And by god friends are important as a child. What you are doing is crushing their spirit with your negativity, anger, lack of trust and fear and insecurities.You are crushing them with the fact, that YOU don’t really like YOURSELF and are afraid to be REAL!! You are crushing within them the wonder of Life.
You are educating them to fear REAL LOVE AND INTIMACY with other Human Beings because YOU, yourself are afraid of real Love and Intimacy. And no where is this more apparent then in the relationships between Men and Women. We are not civilised, look what we do to each other and then call it “Love?” Love is not an “Intellectual” exercise. It is a state of being”and it is real when we except it for real it is our job our responsibility to keep our children loved, safe, secure and fed well at all times till they are ready to leave and maybe do the same with their children, every action and word has a reaction.
Really think about the kinds of values you would want to install in your children. The brain of a child is like a little sponge, it will soak everything up, hold it for as long as it can and then it will wring itself back out. If you want what comes back out of their sponge to be clean for them, then guess what? You need to be completely accountable for your actions.
If you are not ready for near total accountability, you are not ready to have children. I am a capable human being but there have certainly been times where I have literally curled up into a corner and had myself good, heart-wrenching sobs. In those moments I felt there was no possible way I could continue to go on doing what needed to be done but the important thing “never” stop questioning, because curiosity has its own reason for existing .
Children,unfortunately do not come with “time-outs,” however, their needs must be met. In those times I have always managed to pick myself back up and continue to be the capable human being my children deserve and have helped make me. Don’t worry that children never listen to you; worry that they “are always watching you”! and If you have never been hated by your child at some point you have never been a parent.
I have six children and my son’s and daughters know that I may get mad at them from time to time. I may not like some of the things they choose to do, but they know my love for them can never and will never waver no matter what and where ever life may lead them. I will always be right there and this will last the rest of my life,.. it isn’t like a pet where you make a commitment for upwards of the next 18 years tops. A lot of people have this vague notion that once a child turns 18 a parents job is done. If you’re one of them I suggest getting a pet instead of having child .. Look making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.
Like I said before please Really think about the kinds of values you would want to install in your children.. if you think about it our story’s are being written with each new day where you have a chance to collect yourself and prioritise with what is most important to you and your children. Changing your frame of mind for the better can bring wonderful new changes that little bit closer, taking it as an opportunity to reinvent yourself and find a passionate happier life that is right in front of you. take care of each new day as you make your countless choices .
Copyright © 2010,2015 Joanne Wellington All Rights Reserved.
I was walking around in a supermarket when i saw a cashier hand this little boy his money back, the boy couldn’t have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The Cashier said, ‘I’m sorry, but you don’t have enough money to buy this doll.” The little boy turned to the old woman next to him, ”Granny, are you sure I don’t have enough money?” She replied, ”You know that you don’t have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.” Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look around. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.
Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. ‘It’s the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.’ I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. ‘No, Santa Claus can’t bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.’ His eyes were so sad while saying this, ‘My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.” My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said, ‘I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.’ Then he showed me a very nice photo of himself. He was laughing. He then told me ‘I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won’t forget me.’ ‘I love my mommy and I wish she didn’t have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.’ Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. ‘Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll!” OK’ he said, ‘I hope I do have enough.’ I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said, ‘Thank you God for giving me enough money!’ Then he looked at me and added, ‘I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!” ‘I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn’t dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.” ‘My mommy loves white roses.’ A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state of mind from when I started.
I couldn’t get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn’t stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.
She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine, and in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
Now you have 2 choices:
(1) forward this page to your friends.
(2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart xx
I’ve been reading many articles lately about men and women whose spouses/partners have left them unexpectedly leaving them both surprised and devastated.
Most of them had no inkling that the relationship was anything but good. They saw no signs of trouble, unusual behavior, or what was to come crashing down on them.
How does this happen?
Unfortunately it does happen, and it happens to couples that allow themselves to fall into an unconscious routine.
They begin to take each other for granted, lose connection with each other’s thoughts and feelings and generally forget to do the small, considerate things they used to do in the past. It happens more often than anyone would care to admit.
Before the situation deteriorates to the point of no return, there are some things you can do to make sure you and your partner are in sync and working together.
Tips For Maintaining A Good Relationship: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
1- Respect each other. Try to understand each other’s feelings and points of view. Don’t try to change one another now that you’re in the relationships. You were initially attracted to each other for a reason. Remember what it was and continue to appreciate it.
2- Communicate. Never underestimate the importance of good communication. If something is going on inside of you, share it. Don’t keep your feelings, good or bad, to yourself. If you have a problem let your partner in on it. Work on a solution together. It will create intimacy and bring you closer together. When something good happens to you at work or you’ve achieved a goal, share that as well. All sharing and exchanging of information brings people closer to each other. Practice communicating with each other.
3- Do the little things. Be considerate and thoughtful. If you’re getting yourself a coffee, apple or snack from the kitchen ask your partner if he/she wants one too. When your spouse is tired and sore give him/her a back rub or massage. Be aware of each others needs.
4- Don’t get caught up in the rat race. People get too wrapped up in getting ahead and the mechanics of everyday living. They rush around doing, getting, and not taking time to live in the moment. By not paying attention to each other you can become disconnected with yourself and your partner.
5- Maintain a Sense of Humor. Laugh together. Don’t take things too seriously. Barring a tragedy, nothing is so serious that you can’t step back and look at the humorous side. Laughter is contagious and creates intimacy.
6- Take care of and respect yourself. As mentioned in Love Yourself in order function fully, strive for balance. If you don’t take care of yourself, everything around you will fall apart including your relationship.
7- Have a Life. Everyone needs a life of his/her own. If you don’t have one, you not only tend to invade someone else’s space, you probably become too dependent and therefore less interesting. One of the most important things you can bring to a relationship is your unique set of qualities and a different perspective. Contrary to what you may think, maintaining your individuality and having a life of your own strengthens a relationship and keeps it fresh and interesting.
So before things start sliding or become stagnant in your relationship, start developing some good maintenance habits. Communicate, laugh, be independent, take care of yourself and your relationship will not only survive, it will flourish.
DR. LISA LOVE REFLECTIONS
As a counselor I have often told people that they need to learn to love themselves. Yet, while saying this to others, I have at times taken pause to reflect and ask myself, “What does that really mean? How do we know the difference between a self-love and a selfish love? And, what can we do practically to love ourselves in the right way?” Perhaps the quote above holds a clue, because I believe true self love fills us with enough joy, peace, and love that our desire to be loving human beings grows. Because of this we want to express more empathy, compassion, and understanding towards others.Why Real Love Requires Self Love.
Read more>> Why Real Love Requires Sel Love