“A reason why we do not regard others as precious is that we pay great attention to their faults whilst ignoring their positive qualities.Unfortunately we have become very skilled in recognizing the faults of others, and we devote a great deal of mental energy to listing them, analyzing them, and even meditating on them!
And then spend time putting others down. With this critical attitude, if we disagree with our partner, Lover or colleagues about something, instead of trying to understand their point of view we repeatedly think of many reasons why we are right and they are wrong. By focusing exclusively on their faults and limitations we become angry and resentful, and rather than cherishing them we develop the wish to harm or discredit them.
In this way small disagreements can easily turn into conflicts that simmer for months and even years. We can communicate happiness, acceptance and compassion to others by not doing great acts of devotion and self-sacrifice (Which often lead to great resentment).
But by the simple absence of fault-finding and censure, by being ready to empathize with their notions and feelings, instead of forcing them to conform with ours. We can LISTEN quietly and seek to UNDERSTAND!” Try it today
Stop trying to analyse situations your way all the time !!
Step outside the box!.
~LET GO. Pain. Hurt. Grief. Anger. Ache. Agony. Affliction. Resentment. Madness. Rejection. Fear. Pride. Ego. Expectations. Tears. Attachments. Disappointments. Torture. Torment. Trouble. Wound. Irritation. Misery. Vengeance. Selfishness.~
~ALLOW: Acceptance. Compassion. Devotion. Fidelity. Enchantment. Humility. Friendship. Delight. Respect. Trust. Honesty. Kindness. Flame. Charity. Goodness. Grace. Patience. Sweetness. Thoughtfulness. Understanding. Tenderness. Yearning. Heal yourself and LOVE!.. Every thought you think takes you forwards so think wisely.~
Also view Mediums World .
Written by Joanne Wellington for Mediums World
Copyright © 2010,2015 Joanne Wellington All Rights Reserved.
I was doing some thinking today about Friendship and what all it means and implies, it’s obligations and so on. The most important thing to remember is… Always appreciate the friends that you have. A fight may come and go very easily, but a friendship could last forever. For every second spent in anger, a minute of happiness is wasted. Most people walk in and out of your life. But only true friends leave footprints in your heart.
When we look back on our younger years, we will remember the people who went to school with us, the people who made us laugh, the people who hung out with us when nobody else would, and the people who made our lives much better simply by being a part of it. Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget. The language of friendship is not in words but in their meanings.
True real friendships are hard to come by. That is why you need to know the meanings and signs of a true real friendship. It is extremely important to know your true real friends. As you read on below, try and picture your ‘true real friends’ and try and decide whether are they as true and as real as you think they are.
Everyone has friends and need friends. People that we interact with everyday in school, at work, in the same apartment, in the metro,at the gym, the list goes on. But I always believe in quality, not quantity. I would rather have a few true friends than a hundred of regular friends (like on Facebook). Everyone is different and have different perspectives on true friendships but there are some fundamentals for a true friendship that you can’t overlook.
Firstly, this person or true friend needs to give you a huge sense of trust. You need to see this person and believe, “I trust them and want to share everything with this person.” Can you trust them with your secrets? Trust them with your girlfriend or boyfriend? Trust them with your problems or embarrassing moments? These are all things to take note of. It is not easy to feel this way about someone but I have found such friends, and I believe that it is possible for you to find a true friend you can call your own.
Secondly, imagine it is 3 AM in the morning. You met with something unfortunate, let’s say your car broke down. You think of all the ‘friends’ that you have and you slowly make a note of who will actually help you. Finally you settled on someone who might help and called him or her. What would his or her response be? Irritation? Frustration? Or someone who will sacrifice their sleep to get out of bed to either pick you up or assist you by giving you a list of numbers which you can get for help. Let’s say it’s something serious. You really really need someone to talk to in the middle of the night, you’re so desperate you need someone to talk to. Will your ‘friend’ be that someone? A true friend would, no matter how tired they are.
Another sign would be that you will never get tired of a true friend’s company. And vice versa. You all can remain silent and will not feel awkward about it. It sounds very much like a fairy tale but it is true. They will never ever judge you as well. No matter what you did, that person would be there beside you, and correct you if you are really in the wrong, but he or she will never judge you and gossip about you behind your back. A true friend loves without condition and will not expect anything in return.
Of course this gets a little complicated with the opposite sex. It is a fact that when a male and a female gets closer, one of them is bound to start wondering if things can be developed further. The trouble comes in when only one of them is feeling this way. For example, the other party might start expecting to be loved back or might expect you to feel the same way about them. Attraction is tricky business. Therefore, this is one thing that one must be aware of, so that you will know how to handle it when it comes.
True real friends double your happiness and half your burdens. Basically how you would like a true real friend to be, you should be like this to your true friends. Trust, forgiveness,bonding and accountability are some ingredients of a true friend. True friendships are hard to come by. And what’s more, life is short. So treasure these friends if you have already have them. If you don’t continue to search, because once you have them, life becomes so much easier to live, no matter what happens. I have been through pretty rough patches and I dare say, without my friends I would not have made it.
Friendships need lots of energy and patience to maintain them. Not to mention time too. When your friend needs you, sometimes when things are not going too well on your side, it is often so easy to turn a deaf ear to their pleas. It is especially during these times, that you must find the strength in you to help your friend. And it is during these times that your friendship will be forged and made stronger.
And you must always be happy for their successes, even when things are not going too well on your side. It might be hard to do for some people but it is something that you need to learn. Think about all the sacrifices your friend has made for you and all the times when he or she was happy for you despite his or her own troubles.
Think about all the happy times you all enjoyed and the sad, rough times you all went through together. That should give you sufficient patience to actually be a true friend for them. Remember, true friends are the next best thing to family. They will always be your pillar of support no matter what. Always.
Here I would like to narrate a short story regarding the need of friendship and true friends..
My mother used to ask me what is the most important part of the body. Through the years I would take a guess at what I thought was the correct answer. When I was younger, I thought sound was very important to us as humans, so I said, “My ears, Mommy.”
She said, “No. Many people are deaf. But you keep thinking about it and I will ask you again soon.”
Several years passed before she asked me again. Since making my first attempt, I had contemplated the correct answer. So this time I told her, “Mommy, sight is very important to everybody, so it must be our eyes.”
She looked at me and told me, “You are learning fast, but the answer is not correct because there are many people who are blind.”
Stumped again, I continued my quest for knowledge and over the years, Mother asked me a couple more times and always her answer was, “No. But you are getting smarter every year, my child.”
Then last year, my Grandpa died. Everybody was hurt. Everybody was crying. Even my father cried. I remember that especially because it was only the second time I saw him cry. My Mom looked at me when it was our turn to say our final goodbye to Grandpa. She asked me, “Do you know the most important body part yet, my dear?”
I was shocked when she asked me this now. I always thought this was a game between her and me. She saw the confusion on my face and told me, “This question is very important. It shows that you have really lived in our life. For every body part you gave me in the past, I have told you were wrong and I have given you an example why. But today is the day you need to learn this important lesson.”
She looked down at me as only a mother can. I saw her eyes well up with tears. She said, “My dear, the most important body part is your shoulder.”
I asked, “Is it because it holds up my head?”
She replied, “No, it is because it can hold the head of a friend or a loved one when they cry. Everybody needs a shoulder to cry on sometime in life, my dear. I only hope that you have enough love and friends that you will always have a shoulder to cry on when you need it.”
That is the wonderful thing about friendship-you always feel loved and cared about. Friendship is the offspring of spiritual affinity and unless that affinity is created in a moment, it will not be created for years or even generations.
The most beautiful discovery friends can make is that they can grow separately without growing apart.
Prof.Bhushan Manchanda,MCMI – About the Author:
MA (English),PGDMM,MBA (Faculty of Management Studies,University of Delhi,India), Management Education,Training & Soft Skills Consultant. Over 35 years Industry,Education and Training experience.
Associate Professor and Head,Department of Management Studies, Jagannath International Management School(affiliated to GGS Indraprastha University,New Delhi,India)
The flow of the salty water made me feel light
Washed away all my frustration
Wiped out the feeling of humiliation
Erased one by one, all the confusion
Prepared to embrace devil and angel with arms open
The priceless emotion, rolling down
From the most sensible organ
It is called the tear
For me it is very near and dear
Which helps blow the heavier feelings into thin air
It is the new dawn today
Forgotten are the developments of the night yesterday
I am a bit excited at this point in time
Today I have a new task, a new level to climb
A new hope emerged beneath the core of my heart.
It is the new beginning, yes! I am ready to restart today now……~Joanne wellington~
In this article we will talk about the symptoms or kinds of anger, this way you will be able to know how to manage your anger. We will also give some tips on how to cope with your anger. You don’t need anger management treatment because you can do it all by yourself, all you need is peace of mind and realization, then everything will be alright. We will also talk about the things that will trigger anger and the things that most people do when they are angry. This article is for those who are trying to find their way out of this problem and those who want more advice on how to manage their anger.
There are two symptoms of anger, with these examples you will be able to know or identify what kind of anger you are feeling. There many factors or scenarios that triggers our mood or our emotions. There different people in this planet and we all have different ways of showing our feelings. These symptoms will help you identify what kind of anger you are experiencing.
- Aggressive Anger – This is the most common symptom of anger. The symptoms of aggressive anger are: shouting, bullying, driving recklessly, harming animals, using foul languages, destroying objects, verbally and physically aggressive and using illogical arguments. Most people who under this category are with angry with the influence of alcohol and drugs.
- Passive Anger – It is a bit hard to identify, but the feelings are also the same with aggressive anger, they just have different ways of showing their anger like emotional blackmailing, gossiping, back stabbing, and obsessive dependency over things, over-dieting, apathy, perfectionism and showing lack of concern for everything.
The aggressive one tend to hurt people emotionally and physically, or you can obviously see that they are angry, while passive one are quiet and you won’t even notice that they are angry or irritated. They might be angry to you that why they are saying bad things behind you, to destroy your image and etc.
We all know that being angry won’t solve anything. It will just make the situation or the problem worse and you may even say things that you are not supposed to say. You will also hurt someone physically and emotionally if you don’t manage your anger. I know it is hard to fight or control that kind of emotion, but we need to stay calm because if we will let our emotions drive us, then nothing will be solved and you will be just pissed off.
Anger management is important because they will tell you or give you tips that can help you manage your emotions. If you don’t have time for that kind of sessions you can actually try these steps whenever you feel mad or angry about something.
- Try to relax and keep calm whenever there a problem. Try to understand and realize the things around you or what’s happening. Being calm will help you think properly and you will be able to solve the problem in no time.
- Try to go out or avoid people when you are angry, especially if you are that aggressive type, to avoid saying thing or hurting people.
- Making Anger our Friend (mediumsworld.wordpress.com)
- To forgive takes strength to set aside what is often justifiable anger. (joannewellington.wordpress.com)
While forgiveness is a noble act, expressing true forgiveness is empowering because it helps us to stop feeling like victims and to dispel our own suffering at having been wronged. Our levels of anger and hostility decreases while our capacity to love increases. We are better able to control our anger and we have an enhanced capacity to trust. We are freed from the control of past events, which can help us to stop repeating negative behavior. Both our physical and mental health improves. Though many people feel forgiveness is something that must be asked for or earned by another, forgiveness is actually a gift you give to yourself…..
- Forgiveness: Is Holding On To Anger Holding You Back? (mediumsworld.wordpress.com)
- Forgiveness – All in all~The Path To Healing & Spiritual Growth ~ (joannewellington.wordpress.com)